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HS505 : Teaching your child Empathy & Tolerance when interacting with others.

Hanz’s Note : It’s been so long I have not updating Hanafi’s HS progress. Blame it for festive season. Ahaks! Anyway, alhamdulillah, his HS is still ongoing despite this festive mood & that’s the beauty of HS. You decide when can take a break rather follow the school’s standard break!

This update however is an ongoing process and likely different from previous HS updates. Here I like to share on some guide & tips on how to teach a child about empathy and tolerance. Read on. Remember, teaching values is an ongoing process for any children.

Teaching Empathy

Empathy is how us as human being being aware of and being sensitive to another being and able to understand other people’s state and situation. To emphatise, children must be able to read emotional cues such as facial expression and body language.

I’ve drawn those several facial expression (and a lil touch-up by dear hubby) to introduce in-depth several facial expression of people. Then, I asked Hanafi to match those caricatures with real-life faces that match similar facial expression. After that, we discussed why and how those expression occurred.

Another way is through:-

* Example – Experiencing it firsthand by your child is beneficial and you can help him understand by explaining about the situation he just experienced. Develop a feeling vocabulary whereby children can learn to identify & label their feelings.

* Describing feelings to help kids read emotions by :-

Watch television – Be careful though on allowing your child which tv programme is most suitable for your child based on his age. Like us, we prefer to allow our boys watch children’s videos instead as we seldom watch tv due to time constraint.

We love Barney & Bear in the Big Blue House as it has many good features on values!

Listen to books being read – I can’t say enough there’s many books out there that you can always ‘invest’ it for your child. Siri Kisah Rasulullah, Siri Kisah Para Sahabat Nabi, Siri Kisah-kisah Al Quran, all is such a thumbs-up selection. Another alternative is from Grolier. They have a whole set on values which I highly recommend it. Scholastic too is good. All you need just a little effort to ‘look’ them the bookstore or your local library.

* Asking questions

Ask your child a real life situation for any values you want to highlight. If your child answer with “I don’t know’, you can ask your child to make their best guess. Always have an open discussion with your child.

Teaching Tolerance

This one comes in a list which me, myself & dear hubby are giving our best shot to follow do’s & don’ts. Read on!

i) Notice your own attitude. Parents who want their child value diversity can be sensitive to cultural stereotypes, they may have learned & make an effort to correct them.

ii) Remember that kids are always listening. Do not make jokes that perpetuate stereotypes though how harmless fun it is, it can undo tolerance & respect.

iii) Select books, toys, music, art & videos carefully. Keep in mind the powerful effect the media & pop cultures have on shaping attitudes.

iv) Point out & talk about unfair sterotypes that may be potrayed in media.

v) Answer kids questions about differences honestly & respectfully.

vi) Acknowledge & respect differences within your own family. Demonstrate acceptance of your children’s different abilities, interest & styles. Value the uniqueness of each family member.

vii) Remember that tolerance does not mean tolerating unacceptable behaviour. It means that everyone deserves to be treated with respect & should treat others respect.

viii) Help your child feel good about themselves.

ix) Give your child opportunities to work & play with others who are different from them.

x) Be enthusiastic about his response when he is in conversation and keep an eye contact with him.

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October 2, 2009 Posted by | Early Childhood Education, Hanz's Notes, Homeschooling, Parenting in General | 3 Comments

Any idea how this ‘box’ work?


This Recycle Box has been ‘on guard’ for ages along the sides of the road very nearby our house.

But up to this point, I am still unable to figure out how it ‘really’ works!

Anybody knows? Please share it here…

Thanks! Arigato! Muchas gracias!

October 2, 2009 Posted by | Green Living, Hanz's Muse | 6 Comments

How to handle Squabbling Sibblings

Google pictures courtesy

Here are some pointers on how to handle sibling fights:

  • Do not get involved too quickly. Whenever your sons approach you to complain about one another, listen but do not comment. Stay out of the fight and let them deal with it on their own.
  • Do not ask who started it out first or who is at fault. When the brothers fight with one another, hold both children accountable for their actions. If you try to prove that one child is to be blamed, you will make your children more resentful on one another. You will be accused of playing favourites.
  • Do not tell your children that they are grown up and should know better than to fight with one another. Accept that your boys will have differences of opinion and different ways of doing things. If they cannot get along, they can at least try not to interfere with each other activities.
  • Do not declare openly that you can no longer tolerate their behaviour.They may even fight more, realising that their negative behaviour can affect you.
  • Do not feel guilty or take a blame for your son’s fights because you are alone and holding a full-time job.You will be able to handle the sibbling conflicts better when you are confident that you are doing the best you can.
  • Do not lecture your children on fairness or the importance of keeping harmony in the family. You need to help each child find outlets for his emotions rather than fighting with his brother.
  • Do not try to justify that you don’t play favourites.If your eldest son complains that you are not being fair,listen to him and help him work out ways on how everyone in the family can get along with one another.

Hanz’s Note : Thank you so much to Ms Ruth Liew for sharing this great tips in Childwise.

October 2, 2009 Posted by | Parenting in General | 2 Comments